The Weight

My husband and I have been working on a kitchen remodelling project for nearly two months and we are still in the demolition stage. Against my wishes, we have been doing all the work ourselves and it has taken an emotional toll on me. Dealing with clutter, debris, dust, and inconvenience has made me miserable. The frustration of living out of boxes and camping out in my own house has worn thin.

Intellectually, I know that when this is done, we will be so glad that we remodelled and that it will add value to our home. But it seems like it is taking so long to even get started, that I wonder if I will ever see it completed. The stress of this project has been weighing very heavy on me and has made me short tempered and negative.

An very insightful friend recently told me something about myself that hit close to home. My friend's observation upset me very much because it was so close to the truth. It also made me think about how sometimes what appears to be a very good thing can have a very negative effect on people, like this project has to me and I don't like feeling that way.

Often during times like now, a song will run through my head for no apparent reason. Later when I look back on it, that song is very significant to what I am feeling at the time. The song that has been running through my head a lot lately is "The Weight" by The Band, which was on one of my favorite albums of all time, Music From Big Pink.